Home I’ve Named the New House: But How Are We Going to Live in It? By Star LaBranche Posted on February 16, 2019 9 min read 0 0 38 Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on Google+ Share on Reddit Share on Pinterest Share on Linkedin Share on Tumblr First, the house’s new name is Bonbonribbon, after the Sanrio character. Next, it occurs to me that this whole combining households thing is going to be a lot more trying that I first thought. Why? Because people are human beings and human beings loooooove to make things complicated. Really complicated. I can’t act like I’m not a hugely complicated person myself, so I’m not going to. The thing my parents and I have to remember when moving in together is that we have to gel with each other in our different ways. We all have separate interests, strengths, and abilities. We should use each of those in order make the house a more harmonious place. That Sounds Great, But How Are you Going to do it? I think it’s time to call in the professionals. I had a conversation with Dan tonight about the entire situation and he made me realize just how difficult this might be. I’ve been on my own since 2015. I’ve lived in 5 different places in those 4 years, one and a half of those years I’ve lived alone. Now I have to readjust to putting on pants all the time and having think about other people before I order pizza. So I’m going to enlist the help of my therapist and find a professional downsizer for mom. As she needs some help figuring out what to keep and what to get rid of. After 25 years almost of living in that house it’s quite cluttered and my mom does love stuff. Which, I do too, but I’m far more heartless about getting rid of it. What’s the Plan? It goes without saying that living with people is difficult. I’ve had it tear solid friendships apart before, so I’ve seen the destructive power it has. It might seem like this will be better because it is my parents and they know most of my annoying habits. However, it also makes it more complicated because it’s my parents and on a certain level, we’re going to be roommates. However, it also makes it more complicated because it's my parents and on a certain level, we're going to be roommates. Click To Tweet So, What are you Going to do? Here are my ideas which I cobbled together through knowing my parents, living with them as an adult before, and reading some articles on the internet. Pay the mortgage: I will be financially contributing to the household. Be respectful of others’ space: Realize that if the parents want to watch their murder shows for 4 hours every night, I can watch with them or go amuse myself somewhere else. Set boundaries: I need to let them know how to respect my space. This includes letting them know when I need to be left alone. Do chores: It’s important that I not only financially contribute to the house, but that I make it a nice place to live as well. I can do laundry, cooking, take care of the animals, and, of course, be tech support. Be flexible: It’s obvious that in a situation with three people, I’m not going to get my way all the time. I need to be able to recognize what battles I should fight and when I need to let something go. Revise as needed: Clearly, some things will change as we start living together and that’s perfectly okay. We all have to be willing to change and grow together as a family unit. Clearly, some things will change as we start living together and that's perfectly okay. We all have to be willing to change and grow together as a family unit. Click To Tweet Why Do You want to Live with your Parents Anyway? I get this question fairly often. And it’s fine, it’s a societal convention that you leave your parents’ house and never come back. Lots of people remark how they could never see themselves living with their parents again without someone ending up on Investigation Discovery. But really, I like my parents, I don’t like living alone, for all of the things that bug me about them, I want to spend as much time with them while they’re still on this planet, and come on, Dad does dishes! Okay, so the last one was a joke but the rest really wasn’t. I realize I have a limited time with my parents and I want to be able to look back on it without regret. When it comes down to it, this is the right choice for me. It might not be the right choice for other people. But we all need to rid ourselves of the mindset that something I wouldn’t do must be a bad idea. As always, no one knows what the future holds. But it’s shaping up to be a wild ride.